Filial piety in Asian Communities: What is it?

By: Sandy Maw, learn more about Sandy here

Filial piety, or respect and duty towards one’s parents and ancestors, is a cornerstone of many Asian cultures. Originating from Confucian philosophy, it emphasizes the importance of family harmony, respect for elders, and the continuation of familial traditions. While its manifestations differ across countries and generations, filial piety remains a guiding principle that shapes the social fabric of some Asian countries such as but not limited to; China, Japan, Korea, Vietnam, Singapore, etc.

While this concept isn’t as popular in Southeast Asian countries such as Thailand, Cambodia, Philippines and Myanmar, there is still a general expectation of taking care of your older family members due to the societies being more community oriented.

The Roots of Filial Piety

The concept of filial piety (孝, xiào in Chinese) is deeply embedded in Confucian teachings, which stress hierarchy, reciprocity, and family loyalty. Confucius viewed the family as the microcosm of society, where harmonious relationships could lead to societal stability. A child’s obligation to respect, care for, and honor their parents was seen not only as a moral duty but also as a way of ensuring the family’s prosperity and continuity.

Expressions of Filial Piety

Filial piety is expressed in various ways, ranging from obedience to parental wishes to providing physical and emotional care for aging parents. In traditional settings, this often means living with one’s parents even into adulthood, prioritizing their needs over personal ambitions, and preserving family lineage through marriage and having children.

In modern Asian societies, expressions of filial piety are changing with urbanization, globalization and changing family structures. However, the essence of filial piety endures through adapting to new circumstance. For example, this may look like financially supporting parents or staying connected through technology can be seen as modern ways of fulfilling this duty.

Challenges in the Modern World

As societal dynamics shift and cultures evolve, so do the challenges of trying to implement traditional values such as filial piety. Younger generations in Asian communities often find themselves torn between traditional expectations and contemporary aspirations. Balancing personal independence and family obligations can lead to feelings of guilt, conflict, or even resentment. This could also partly be exaggerated by the way that the different generations communicate with each other, many young individuals now are unable to speak the same language or dialect as their elders, which makes the conversation to being lost in translation more likely or limiting what they could talk about.

The aging population in many Asian countries also place more pressure on caregiving systems since the younger generations are gravitating more towards their careers, global mobility and individual interests/hobbies. In my experience, I have definitely witnessed many elders in Singapore emphasize to the younger generations the importance of fulfilling filial piety or the younger generations would be a disappointment if this expectation was not met. This can lead to a lot of heated conversations where the elders may guilt or talk negatively to the younger individuals, which could in turn lead to a rift in their relationship and feelings of resentment.

Impact of Filial Piety on Mental Health

Filial piety can profoundly influence the mental health of people in the Asian communities due to its deep-rooted nature in some Asian cultures. While it does foster a strong sense of belonging and purpose, the weight of expectations tied to this cultural value can also lead to stress, anxiety and feelings of inadequacy. Specific examples include when younger individuals feel as though they are falling short of their perceived duties, or when their elders remind them of their shortcomings in reciprocating the care for their elders.

Navigating intergenerational differences, especially in immigrant families, can exacerbate these pressures. For mental health providers working with Asian patients, understanding the cultural significances of filial piety is crucial in providing empathetic and effective care. By acknowledging these deep-rooted values, clinicians can help patients balance their familial obligations with their personal well-being, in a culturally sensitive manner. There are also other ways that we can as individuals take steps to nurture our own mental health regardless of the external factors, which I expand on in my other post, Nurturing Mental Health: My Personal Journey as an Immigrant and a Therapist.

Despite these challenges, filial piety has held and continues to hold immense cultural and emotional significance in many Asian communities. It fosters a sense of intergenerational connection, gratitude and collective identity. By understanding and adapting this tradition to fit modern realities, Asian communities preserve the essence of this value and ensure it gets passed on to the future generations. If you find yourself struggling to balance your personal and professional aspirations while trying to provide care in your familial relationships, it might be helpful to talk to a mental health professional who is culturally informed about these values, feel free to reach out to me and schedule a free consultation here.